Friday, 7 March 2014

Help! My husband wants to kill me with sex

It was drama in a customary court in Mararaba area of Abuja recently when a newly wedded housewife asked the court to dissolve her four months old marriage because she could not stand the sexual urge of her husband.
Madam Veronica told the crowded court that, “From where I come from sex is secondary and he was told so. He never told me that he was a sex starved man, with a big stick (this comment threw the court room into prolonged laughter) which he uses to punish me every other hour. I am tired and cannot stand his sex demands. The man na he goat.” Another round of prolonged laughter engulfed the court round.

Buttressing her point, the lady asked the court to call in husband and ask him how many times they have lengthy rounds of sex daily. She gave an answer, “My Lord, everyday we have sex about 10 or 12 times daily, they are usually lengthy and he never gets tired. I wonder if he uses drugs and when I asked him, he said no. I don’t believe him. No man can do sex as this my husband.”
In his defence, the husband a local native doctor said that is how he was created by God. “She is not the first woman to leave me and she won’t be the last. Others did not bother coming to court, they packed their bags and left. She could have done the same instead of embarrassing herself and me here.”
He went on, “I know there are women who like and love prolonged sex and always, but I have not been fortunate to find them yet. Since she has brought me to court and make my case public, maybe those ladies out there would find the need to reach me. She can go my Lord.”

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